An Open and Practical Discussion About Obeying God

If you ever feel like you aren’t obeying God, or you regularly mess up, or you want to change some behaviors, then this message is for you.  This message is for you regardless of whether you are a new Christian or you have been a Christian for many years, for the issues we discuss today don’t simply go away with time. 

Today I want to encourage you and help you in obeying God’s directions for your life.  I’m going to try to keep it practical.  I also want to be brutally honest and open in this discussion because I also think that helps.

Obeying God is hard.  I know that to the mature Christians hearing this that statement probably sounds like blasphemy.  I’m not saying that obeying God should be hard, or that God wants it to be hard, I’m just saying that it is hard for the vast majority of people.  It was certainly hard for me, and honestly, despite all you may think of me or see of me online, it’s still hard.  The ways in which it is hard changes over time, and in some ways it does get easier, but it’s still hard.

I’m going to spend a couple of minutes talking about my youth.  I want you to understand where I started in my obedience journey.  While teaching I have several times made the comment that nothing about Christianity came naturally to me.  I use that statement to assure people that I don’t think I’m perfect and I never want to put on any kind of holier than thou attitude.  But that statement is the truth.

My parents, fortunately, had me in church and a Christian school, and I prayed the sinner’s prayer with my teacher in third grade.  I do believe I was saved at that moment, but it was a long 15 years or so before I committed my life to Christ.  In my childhood my parents divorced, married each other again, and then divorced again.  I know that created some psychological problems.  I also was mercilessly ridiculed in class by my first-grade teacher, and that really meant I had no friends in first and second grade. 

In third grade I started making friends by misbehaving.  My friends were the kids who also misbehaved.  If you don’t change that pattern, you end up being with people with the wrong behaviors, and that’s what happened to me.  I started drinking and getting high when I was 14.  I started using stronger drugs when I was 16, and honestly if my parents hadn’t enforced a curfew I would probably be dead.  By the time I was in college I got drunk and high every single day and regularly used harder drugs. 

And I could keep going on all the bad things in my life.  I watched the wrong movies, listened to the wrong music, went the wrong places, did the wrong things, hung out with the wrong people, you name it.  And let me just say that I’m not trying to attack anyone or be degrading to anyone from my past.  I just should have been hanging with people who pursued different activities and the things of God with their life.  I should have been running with the church crowd, and I basically ran with the opposite crowd.

So while my outer life, for the most part, looked terrible, my inner life probably looked even worse.  I never got over the emotional issues from my childhood.  Fear of rejection, insecurity, parental problems, addictions and all sorts of other issues were always with me.  If you could think of all the opposites of the fruits of the spirit, whatever those would be, those were probably the fruits of my life.  I mean there is simply no explanation other than God for the fact that I’m alive today and I didn’t get killed by something or someone.  

Just as an example, I remember one time trying to buy drugs in Barcelona in the middle of the night.  I was completely black out intoxicated, but while the dealers were leading me down a back alley, I had this instant revelation that they were going to hurt me, and I ran away.  I know now that God cut through everything going on in my brain and warned me.

So I had serious problems, and all of those serious problems became deeply engrained in me.  They grew deep roots into me physically and psychologically.  And in May of 2004, at age 23, when I finally decided to devote my life to God, none of those problems instantly disappeared.  My obedience journey, if you will, has been a very long one, and it’s still going.  And what I’m talking about today is what I’ve learned over this nearly twenty-year journey.

Now please stay with me as I discuss some spiritual realities.   Yes, you can attempt your holiness journey with a mostly physical perspective.  But if you understand some spiritual reality and a few key concepts, it will greatly help you.  At least these points have greatly helped me.

In John 3, Jesus explains that we must be born again to enter the Kingdom of God.

In 1 John 3:9, John tells us that whosoever is born of God does not commit sin, for God’s seed is in that person.

In 2 Corinthians 5:17, Paul tells us that if anyone is in Christ, that person is a new creature, old things are passed away, all things are become new.

It’s important to understand then your true self is a spirit.  You are a spirit being and you are inhabiting a physical body.  If your body dies you will not cease to exist, you will leave the body.  One day, if you are a Christian, you will have a glorified body.  We don’t need to discuss all of that, and I’m not suggesting I understand it all.  But you should understand that you are a spirit living in a body.

When you receive Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, you are instantly created anew, born-again.  Your physical body isn’t created anew.  Your brain isn’t created anew.  But the real you, your spirit, is born again.  This is how you are a new creation.  This is how God’s seed is in you.  This is how you are God’s child.  You, as a spirit, are born again, and you are born directly from God.

Your born-again spirit is perfect and sinless in the eyes of God.  Your born-again spirit is also united with the Spirit of God, further contributing to this idea of a new creation.  And while you may still make mistakes and sin with your body and with your mind, those sins do not touch your perfect spirit, which is now righteous with God’s own righteousness.  See Hebrews 10:14 and 2 Corinthians 5:21 for Scriptural support on those points.

Every sin you have ever committed and will ever commit has already been forgiven.  It’s already been covered by the blood of Jesus.  You are, spiritually speaking, perfect and sinless and righteous.  You are totally in God’s grace and mercy and love, and nothing can separate you from the love of God (Romans 8:38).

Please take a moment and consider those amazing, wonderful truths.  Internalizing those truths into your mental framework will greatly help your freedom journey.

But, despite all the amazing things that happen to your spirit, nothing automatically happens to your body or your mind.  It would be amazing if our bodies and our minds were also recreated and stripped of the effects of sin in our lives, but it just doesn’t work that way.  Our bodies and our minds still have all the old memories, all the old roots, all the old addictions and muscle memories, and all the old issues.  I recognize that at salvation sometimes people receive miraculous deliverances from addictions and things like that, and praise God for that, but that is not the norm. 

While your spirit is perfect the moment you get saved, your body and mind are not.  And just to be clear, this is why we have so many Christians, myself included, that still make lots of mistakes. 

Why do Christians, even prominent and long-time Christians, still make mistakes?  Why do you and I still make mistakes if our spirits are perfect?  It’s because our minds and our bodies are not perfect.  While the perfection of our spirits happens instantly, the work for our minds and our bodies, specifically the work to renovate our minds and bring our bodies into subjection, is a journey. 

So this is why the New Testament, and all the Scriptures directed to God’s Church and Christians, are filled with directions for holy living.  You need to change the way you think so that you think according to God’s Word.  You need to start loving people.  You need to start honoring people.  You need to stop thinking about the wrong things and you need to stay away from the wrong activities and the wrong entertainment.  You also need to change some physical activities.

Let’s be honest, if we surveyed the New Testament we could come up with a long list of rules that Christians are supposed to follow.   And if a new Christian actually took the time to make that list, he or she might find it overwhelming and discouraging?  If I am making all these mistakes, how is God ever going to accept me?  If I have to change so many aspects of my life, I’m never going to be good enough.  God is always going to be mad at me.  And on and on we could go.

And now I pray that God helps me articulate this situation well, because these next points are extremely important.

I want you to take all of God’s rules and directions for Christian living and put them on one side.  You could just visualize a list in your mind, for example.  Do whatever you need to so you can compartmentalize them and segregate them in your mind. 

Now, in the other compartment, I want you to put all of the statements about how God loves you, about how God cares for you and wants the best for you.  I don’t mean look them all up, you have probably heard many of them over the years.  Just visualize a list of all of those.  Remember that God sent Jesus to die for you even when you were at your worst (John 3:16, Romans 5:8).  You didn’t have to do a single thing to earn your salvation.  You never could earn it.  You know that.  God’s greatest gifts are a free gift of God’s grace.  Think about all the verses about God’s love and mercy and grace for you.

So now we have our two lists, our two groups of ideas, God’s directions for holy living on the one side and all of God’s statements about His love, grace and acceptance of us on the other.  We must understand the correct interaction between these groups.  The interaction between these two groups of verses has been misunderstood and wrongly taught by vast numbers of Christians for hundreds and hundreds of years. 

You must understand that the second group, with all of the verses about God’s love, mercy and grace for you, exists entirely independent of the first group which is God’s directions for your life.  God loves you despite your sins.  God loves you despite your mistakes.  You are fully in God’s grace despite all of your failures to follow His directions.  You are God’s beloved child from the very first moment you became a Christian, and nothing will ever change that.

Now, when you understand those truths about the second group, and God’s love and grace for you, then you can correctly approach all of God’s directions for your life.  You can correctly start your holiness journey.

All of God’s instructions are in fact given to you because God loves you, not so that you can earn God’s love.  The first group, the list of directions, are in fact born out of the second group.  God’s instructions are a gift of God’s grace, they were not given so that you can earn God’s grace.  God’s instructions are an act of His mercy, they are not given to make sure you stay in His mercy. 

There are many people who have thought that God’s love for them or goodness for their lives depended on their obedience.  So they have worked through prayer, fasting, Bible study, and other means, to consecrate themselves and live a holy life.  You know, there are certainly worse ways to live.  I’m not trying to condemn those people.  Good for them.  A consecrated life is much better than a sinful life, regardless of how you got there.

But let us, at least those of us who are still on an obedience journey, embrace this true reality for God’s directions.  God loves us to the max already, and our behavior will never earn any more of God’s love.  Our obedience will never earn any more of God’s promises.  God’s directions are an act of God’s love and they are meant to lead us into our best possible lives and the highest expression of ourselves.

I know I have shared that thought many times, and I don’t want to be redundant.  But I view that understanding as one of the greatest revelations of my life, and it’s worth repeating.  So just remember, God’s directions, however difficult they may seem, are meant to bless you and help you to your best possible life.

Before we move on to some practical steps I do just need to share some thoughts on the results of disobedience.  Jesus took all the punishment for your sins, and there is no more punishment for your sin (please read Isaiah 53).  But we live in a fallen world.  If you sow bad seeds then you are going to reap a bad harvest.  That’s not God’s punishment, that’s just the way life works.  God’s directions help you only to sow good seed.  Also, there are many unclean spirits in this world, and certain behaviors open us to their influence and attacks.  God’s directions also help us avoid them.

Another truth, unfortunately, is that if you don’t align your life with God’s directions, you will miss out on a lot of what He has for you.  You’ll miss out on knowing Him intimately which happens in this process.  You’ll miss out on many of the works He has for you to do, which are all about His love for others and which do require a certain amount of purity (2 Timothy 2:21).  That’s just the way it is.  God’s not going to use a person who doesn’t obey His directions and lives in all the sins of the world.  That’s just the Biblical truth.

My point here is that in my obedience journey I’m not working to earn God’s love or God’s mercy or God’s promises.  I’m working on my obedience because I love God and trust that He wants what is best for my life.  I trust that He knows the best ways for me to live, so I’m going to follow His directions. 

So how do we start on this journey of obedience?  And remember, a life of obedience or consecration isn’t some weird monk life where you take the poverty vow and the chastity vow and all sorts of unbiblical vows.  A true obedience journey is simply where you begin following God’s directions both internally and externally.

Personally, I think the right way to start is an honest conversation with God.  “God, I see in the Bible that you have lots of directions for how I should live.  I recognize that I could do better.  Your word says that I shouldn’t ______, ______, and _______, but I have done those for a long time, and honestly I enjoy _______ and ________.  Please help me.”

God is not going to tell you to immediately and radically change every aspect of your life, that’s just not how He does it.  Yes, you could read the Bible and make a list and go that route.  I’m not saying there is anything wrong with that, and some people do that.  But you don’t need to try that, and you should be careful there.  Personally, I tried to radially change every area of my life in one week.  That resulted in a lot of frustration, mistakes, and a real pharisee attitude that, looking back, I’m not proud of at all.  That also led to a lot of broken relationships.

I think that rather than focusing on which behaviors you should stop, you should focus on which behaviors you should start.  The directions in Galatians chapter 5 are very helpful.  If you start focusing on doing the right things, you will lose interest in, and stop doing, the wrong things.

Focus on reading your Bible, going to church, and praying.  Start listening to good Bible teachers and some Christian music.  I’m not suggesting that you go crazy spending every second of free time on these activities.  But start spending some time with them.  Even a daily routine with a short prayer and Bible study time, and church on Sundays, is a great way to start.

Reading books by Kenneth E. Hagin had a huge impact on me.  Many of them are cheap and short and easy to read, and they are filled with practical teachings on getting closer to God and living for Him.

As you start engaging in good actions, actions that mature you spiritually and help change your thinking in Godly ways, you are going to change.  I don’t mean that to sound scary, it’s just a simple truth.  What you want to do will change.  How you want to spend your time will change.  Your desires will change.  You will learn more and more about God and His directions.  In this way, following God’s directions is a gradual process, and you start wanting to follow them, rather than forcing yourself to do so. 

I know some people do have issues with behaviors they want to change, and then they feel condemnation when they mess up and they think that it’s too hard or they aren’t going to make it.  Don’t let this happen to you.  Just spend more time doing the right things and trusting the process.  Your mind and desires will change, and the desire for the old things will fall away.

Now we should briefly discuss stopping certain behaviors, as sometimes we can all agree certain behaviors should be immediately stopped.  As you pray and as you read God’s Word, day by day, what area of your life do you keep thinking about?  Where do you know that you need to make some changes?  If something is obvious, or if you think God is really telling you to stop something, then take the issue to God. 

Ask God to help you with that area of your life and those choices.  Ask God to help you, by His Holy Spirit, to lose that desire, to start disliking that type of action.  Philippians 2:13 says that God gives us both the power and the desire to do His will, and I think that’s a wonderful verse.  Pray that verse over your life, and specifically over areas of your life where you might be struggling.

I think the best help I have found is changing what I’m thinking about.  If you start thinking about something, you are going to move towards it.  Sometimes after a hard day lawyering I think about going to have a few beers.  I never actually do it, but I think about it.  Other times I will think about being harsh with my wife about something, or doing something else I shouldn’t do.  When you sense the wrong thoughts or a mental temptation, force your mind in another direction.  Go for a walk with some music on.  Turn on a television show with completely different subject matter.  Do whatever it takes to move your mind away from that action.  All I can say is that this really helps me.

You are not going to become perfect at following God’s directions immediately.  It’s going to take time and study and fellowship with God’s Spirit.  But a significant degree of obedience is available to Christians when we get our minds right and live in fellowship with the Holy Spirit.  This is the great message from Romans 7 and 8.  Obedience to God’s directions can be a process and a journey, but spiritual thinking and living is the recipe for success.

True consecration is not about religious observance, rather, it’s about purity before God so that God can bring you into every aspect of His wonderful plan for your life.  Purity can sound complicated or unappealing, but it shouldn’t.  Purity is about remaining clean from sinful and bad things that are in the world.  Purity isn’t about not having fun or excitement.  Sinful and impure things are dirty and they will hurt your mind and your life.  That’s why God wants us to stay away from them, they keep us from our best possible lives.

Purity is actually fun.  Obedience is actually fun.  It’s good to be pure and holy before God, because that keeps your heart and mind focused on Him and sensitive to Him.  He is always there, always wanting to guide us into His amazing plans for our lives.  Purity and obedience are very important parts of this journey, and they will richly bless every aspect of your life.

I’m going to end by discussing my current life a little bit, and here is some more brutal honesty for you.  If the average person looked at my life, they wouldn’t see a lot of sin.  I don’t know that I do anything that the world would even consider sin.  The vast majority of my issues are internal, anger, selfishness, pride, and so on.  I’ve come a long way with those issues as well, but I’ve still got a ways to go.

A few days ago I was walking my dog.  As we were walking down the sidewalk I had to take a work call.  I didn’t hear the bicyclist ring his bell behind me.  In my community we have both a bike lane and a wide sidewalk.  After what I guess was a few seconds, I recognized someone incessantly ringing a bicycle bell, and I turned around to see this guy hammering away at his bell, clearly annoyed that we were taking up the whole sidewalk.  I was annoyed and I pointed out that I’m a pedestrian and he should be in the bike lane.  He told me I should walk my dog (who was on a leash of course) at the dog park.  The conversation escalated and he then said, “just wait until you see what I do next time.”  Well, I didn’t really like that comment, and I let him know in no uncertain terms how I felt about his threat.  I didn’t know if he meant he was going to hurt me or my dog or what.  So I started asking him, with serious volume, what he was going to do?  You can imagine how that sounded.

I guess he decided this altercation wasn’t a good idea, and he rode off on down the sidewalk.  Just as a side note, my phone call was with a woman that I work with almost every day, and that I’ve worked with for years, she got to hear all of this, and she definitely heard a side of me she has never heard before.

I continued walking home, and by the time I got home I felt really bad about what happened.  This is the Holy Spirit’s work in my heart.  For the most part, I felt completely right about my position in the argument.  But I knew that I should have just moved to the side, apologized for taking up the whole sidewalk, and gone on.  That’s turning the other cheek.  That’s staying out of strife.  That’s walking in love even when it’s hard.  So I got in my car and found the guy.  I’m sure when he say me standing by my car on the side of the road he thought I was there to fight him.  Anyway, he stopped and we made peace.

So my friends, I’ve still got a ways to go, and the Holy Spirit is still working on me.  Now, of course, for the rest of the day the devil was working on me too.  Look at you.  You’re still so carnal.  You’re never going to make it.  You’re never going to measure up.  But none of those comments were from God.  I had to remind myself of God’s unconditional love and acceptance for me and that I’ve come a long way.  God loves me even in my failures, even at my worst, and I’m still totally in God’s grace and mercy.

Many times have I been tempted to make the wrong decisions when it comes to strife or conflict, and many times I’ve done better than I did the other day.  Even more encouraging, often I’m not tempted to act incorrectly at all.  I recognize now that God loves everyone and I can often remember His love for others, even when I feel they are mistreating me.  I’m very grateful for that work of the Holy Spirit in my heart. 

In your obedience journey, you will experience the work of the Holy Spirit in you as well.  You start wanting to love people and wanting to follow God’s directions.  As your wants change, your mind, body and spirit being moving towards unity, and obedience to God becomes natural, part of your nature.  Obedience to God becomes easier, it becomes your default response and method of operating.  That’s an awesome place, and with God’s help we can all get there.  And that is when you really step into an obedience that is both fruitful and joyful, as it’s meant to be.